Rene had no trouble finding me in the lounge. And I'd only had two beers, not too many I thought to drink and ride.

"Hi Dad. Why are you here?"

"Come on, lets go. I think it will get dark a little faster then you planned."

"I know I should have been here twenty minutes ago, but I hated to leave Julio. Finally it was Mack knocking on the door that got us moving."

I paid my bar tab and we went out to the stables. I wasn't certain how we were going to return the horses but I was just petty enough to leave that detail to Rene. I wasn't too surprised when we had to take a taxi to Eden Bay in the end.

They'd held our reservation, apparently Rene had told them we'd be arriving late. And by the time we got there we were so hungry that we went to dinner before we went to our rooms.

I believe it was Sun Babe who said that one thing to remember about nudist's resorts, "is there will be people there better looking then you and worse looking then you." That was certainly true for me. It was not equally true for Rene though. I don't believe there was anyone there that evening more attractive then my daughter.

"Isn't this place great?"

No!

I slowly came out of my red fury and found myself sitting across a dining table from my daughter, my naked daughter. We were in a hotel dining room full of naked people. I know you've had the SAT/Actor's Nightmare, where you find yourself in the middle of some very important situation with no idea how you got there, what is going on and no clothes. Well, its just as bad as you imagined it would be. Sweat began to spring from my body and I was shivering with the cold. My napkin, in my lap began to tent just as a little kid ran up to me, a naked little kid of maybe five years old. I felt my mind slipping. The food was good but I wasn't going to last.

After dinner I very much wanted to keep my napkin with me. I'm sure it would have attracted the very attention I was trying to avoid. When we got back to our cases and clothes behind the bar I so wanted to put them on. Just my pants, Pleazzzzzze!

Rene had a map to our rooms and I made sure to follow beside her as she lead the way. The place looks like any other four star resort which under the circumstances just made everything more surreal.

My card opened the door Of the first room. Rene pushed past me.

"Oh, if you want this room, then I'll need the card to the other room."

"Other room? Dad they only rent to couples, I had to book us both in the same room. I think they think I'm your under age wife or girlfriend."

The same room? She had said something about double occupancy but what did that mean about beds? Since we had some privacy, I put my pants back on.

"Oh, dear!"

That was from Rene. I followed her into the bedroom and found what I expected, one bed.

"Yup, that looks like a lover's bed to me." I hated myself for saying it but I felt I was on the edge of hysteria. It was an extra large king but it was just one bed. And I thought I'd been so clever when I hadn't packed pajamas.

"I forgot to ask for two beds."

Oh yeah? I hadn't noticed. At least I kept that one in my head, I think.

I walked swiftly over to the phone, picked up the receiver and handed it to her. I then disappeared into the bathroom. I don't think its a good thing for kids to see their parents become babbling idiots. (I'd already concluded I'd been wrong about kids seeing their parents naked, and vice verse was even worse.)

The Jacuzzi tub in the bathroom looked nice and big, big enough for two. (Yeah, that's a good idea, torture yourself.)

While I was trying not to listen I could tell from Rene's tone of voice that she was not getting her way.

"No luck Dad."

I came out of the bathroom determined to look her in the eyes and not to tell her how she'd screwed up.

Yup! It was a mistake. I should have staid in the bathroom and talked to her through the door. Damn it! She was my daughter, the way she was born, in her birthday suit. (of course on her birthday she didn't long flowing blonde hair, large firm breasts or light brown pubic hair.) DAMN IT! "Wood be Gone!" "Go away, come again another day." Shit! I was over forty, I was supposed to have trouble getting hard, not getting soft.

"Did you tell them you were my daughter?"

"No. I thought they might throw us out completely. They just kept going on about how they didn't have any rooms left with double beds and how they couldn't allow us to stay one to a room. I think if was ready to pay for four people in two rooms I might have gotten somewhere but I wasn't."

I looked at the bed. It was huge. But we were father and daughter and while I wasn't naked any longer ... there was only one bed. I wondered if I could sleep in the Jacuzzi.

"I'm sorry dad. I screwed up."

The phone rang. Now what? Rene answered it. Her face lit up.

"I'll be right there." She hung up the phone. "Julio is here."

Rather then go home Julio had followed us to Eden Bay. Rene was able to arrange for a double room, with one bed, for Julio and herself. She came back to pick up her bag and give me a hug. She was still naked of course which made her hug a little disturbing, to me (even worse then when she'd pushed past me some minutes ago).

I followed Rene to the door. Julio was standing in the hall with a small bag and his clothes in his hand. He had the darkest penis I'd ever seen but I couldn't decide if it was larger or smaller then mine.

But I could see what was on his mind. (You don't need a lie detector with a man, you just need to ask the right questions.)

Soon all I saw were their asses so I went back into my now too large room and checked what was on TV. Nothing interesting enough to keep my mind in the room. So I took a decongestant and a hot soak in the Jacuzzi tub. That did it.

I'm not sure how much later it was when I realized I was not alone. I'd been sound asleep since I'd dragged myself from the Jacuzzi and it felt like years had passed. "Hello?"

"Its me Dad."

"Turn on the light."

Rene turned on the bedside lamp. Her face was puffy and it looked like she'd been crying. She was naked of course. And I had stupidly gotten undressed when I took my bath. But she was crying and I opened my arms to my little girl and she crawled onto the bed.

"Baby, what's wrong?"

"Did you know that Julio was married?"

"Married? No, I had no idea." But as I thought about it, it seemed to be a natural. Mack had looked locally for a man for Rene. He'd chosen a married man because he knew Rene was young and he didn't want a man who would try to go home with her, like Dana. Mack wanted someone who would do his job but not want a long term relationship.

"What happened? How did you find out?"

"He told me that Mack had let him go after we left. Mack paid him for the four days but Mack had originally told him it was going to be six days. That last time you and Jason stayed for six days. Julio had told his wife it would be six days and that he would return with over a thousand dollars but Mack only paid him for four days. Julio followed us here because his wife didn't expect him home for two days and he thought we might pay him for the two extra days. Because Mack had charged us much more then he was paying Julio, Julio would only ask for two hundred dollars a day."

Rene just cried and shivered in my arms for a while. It sounded reasonable and I should have suspected as much when Julio showed up here but I'd been caught up in the romance of the prostitute who'd liked the girl enough to follow her. Julio had liked my money was what he'd liked. I guess Rene got caught up in the romance too.

Rene had left Julio with the room for the night but she never wanted to see him again. And she'd brought her bag with her. I moved over to make room for her, on top of the covers (sheets, because that I was using in the warm room).

"I knew from the way you said it that first night that he was a prostitute but when he showed up here I thought ..."

"Yeah, me too."

"He never said anything about his family until I said I didn't have any money and that I wouldn't ask you for any."

I waited for the rest.

"Then he told me about his wife and the baby they're expecting and how she was counting on the money." More crying. "I'd never have ... if I'd known he was married."

"Yeah, I know." But did I? Would it have stopped me from enjoying Christa and Madeline if I'd known they had husbands back in Eastern Europe? It would have screwed up my fantasy some but I think I'd still have fucked them. After all, it had been there choice, and if I didn't fuck them, and nobody did, then they wouldn't have any money to take back home.

I didn't feel it was a good time to tell Rene that Julio had just been doing a job and probably really needed the money. I also didn't tell her that I would have been willing to give Julio the two hundred a day for the next two days. Just to see Rene happy.

I thought about calling Mack and telling him he'd screwed up in selecting Julio but he'd been doing me a favor, and making a lot of money on the deal too. But he could just have easily told me that, "no," he only dealt in female prostitutes. He had a year and a half after all to book the two rooms. But then he'd had a year and a half to make sure he had the right guy.

I had a flash of an even nastier thought. I hoped Julio's health card was legit. I knew Mack was money hungry, but would he take a chance with a repeat customer?

I don't know when Rene fell asleep but I know when she woke up and crawled under the covers, it was when the automated air conditioning kicked in. I rolled over and faced the wall while she was messing with the sheet. She slid over to me and cupped her body around my back, wrapping one arm over my chest and pushing the other under my neck.

I guess she could sleep that way, maybe she had with Julio, but I sure couldn't. I should have gotten out of bed and put my pants back on. But ...

Would Rene still want to hold me when I got back in bed or would she be too self conscious? There was no way I was going to be able to relax, even with my pants on, even with a suit of armor on. But ... My daughter was sixteen, and this was probably the last time she was going to curl up with her dad, even if she felt the need again, she wouldn't do it again. Most especially if I got up now and pulled on my pants, clearly telling her how much her proximity upset me.

So I suffered, in the arms a beautiful naked girl, for the rest of the night. Can you sympathize?

I was awake hours later when Rene woke up for the day. Her voice was breath on my ear and I was hard again instantly.

"How long have you been awake?"

"A while."

"Should we get something to eat?"

Uh, no."

I slid out of bed and pulled on my pants and dirty shirt without turning around.

"I think we should decide if we're going to stay."

"Huh?"

I turned around and faced her.

She looked almost as good as she had last night. "Put some clothes on."

"What? I thought you said-"

"Just put the clothes on. I won't talk to you until you do."

We stared at each other for a moment and then I got a smart idea and hid in the bathroom.

"Dad, I have to use the toilet."

"Did you put your clothes on?"

"This is silly Dad, you've already seen me naked. What is the point-"

"I'll explain only to a dressed Rene."

There were grunts that sounded like a teenager dealing with a stupid parent.

"I'm dressed. Can I come in and drop my pants now?"

I opened the door, she was dressed so I exchanged places with her.

While Rene took care of her business in the bathroom I closed the curtains. There were naked people out there everywhere. I realized I was a prisoner in my hotel room. I couldn't go to breakfast without removing my clothes. I couldn't even check out ... well that probably wasn't so but everyone between here and there, especially pretty girls and mothers with little kids, were going to think I was a pervert if I walked from here to the lobby with my clothes on.

I heard the lock in the bathroom door turn and the door opened to reveal ... a very annoyed Rene.

"When did you become such a hypocrite?"

"When did you become so nonchalant about your body?"

"You always said a body was a natural thing and nothing to be ashamed of."

"I know. And you always acted like I was the sexual deviant that you had to put up with. And embarrassment, but what could you do? So when did you go from always making sure everything was covered to not caring?"

Rene thought about it. "Day before ... three days ago?"

"In other words, the first full day at Viking."

"Yeah. The morning Julio and I were still naked and I didn't care who saw me. And who was going to see me? I bunch of hookers who got naked all the time for money? And a bunch of guys so satisfied with their hookers they wouldn't notice another naked girl wandering around."

"And your father, the nudists."

"Yeah. But then there was Sofia, and it was clear she made you more tense and not less. But then there was Christa and ... I didn't get why you were still tense."

Yeah, why was I?

Because my cock got stiff every time I looked at her. But I had told her that it was impossible for a body to be dirty. It was what went on in the mind of the beholder that was ... Okay, I was damned.

Not a total surprise actually.

But ...

"If you knew I was so uncomfortable around you, when you didn't have much clothes on, why did you book five days here?"

I'd caught her.

She didn't answer for a long time.

It was a test of wills, and mine had taken a battering already, and I was short on sleep too.

"We can't leave, we have to stay."

A different tack but I was ready for it. "We can tell them we were wrong and we're uncomfortable and can't stay."

"We prepaid."

"We'll ... forfeit."

"Eight hundred dollars?"

"Eight hundred dollars."

"What about the plane tickets?"

"What about them? You moved them once-"

"And I can't move them again. They charged us a hundred and fifty dollars to move them to Wednesday. If we move them again, we'll have to buy fresh ones."

"So, we'll buy fresh ones."

Then I had a terrible thought.

"What did you tell Mom when you changed our reservations, not just through the weekend but into next week?"

There was a long pause. And the longer the pause, the worse the situation got. If she didn't come up with a good answer soon, the decision would be taken out of our hands. Elly would cut off my credit card and send out the FBI.

"Mom was going to meet our plane last night."

"I know."

"Did she meet our plane, or did you tell her we weren't coming home, last night?"

No answer.

"She would have called Mack. Did you tell Mack we were coming here?"

No answer.

I walked over to the phone and handed it to her.

"Guess what?"

"Its my mess and I have to fix it." She took the phone like a trouper and dialed zero. "Hi, this is Rene in room 2201, I need to call the states. Uh huh. Yeah. I have a credit card." Here she looked at me.

What was I going to do? I nodded. At least I thought we still had a credit card. I really didn't want to be in the room when she talked to Elly but where could I go, with my clothes on?

"Uh huh. Okay, I'll be right over." And she hung up.

"What was that about?"

"They said they have to run my credit card, over at the desk."

Okay. I dug out my wallet and gave her the card.

"Okay, I'm sorry."

"Not as sorry as when Mom gets a hold of you."

Rene nodded and ran out of the room. She ran back in a moment later. "Sorry." she said as she undressed and then ran out again in naked glory.

I shook my head and sat down. Yeah, I should have packed, but I wasn't like I'd really unpacked. There was still five channels of Spanish on the TV.

A long while later Rene returned with out knocking.

"Okay, I've got good news and bad news." "How about no news until you put some clothes on?" She growled at me as she pulled on her skirt and top, nothing underneath. The growling was something she and I used to do when she was little. Not the best move under the circumstances, to remind me she used to be my little girl. Then again, my little girl had been willful and stubborn, particularly about getting her way. But she'd never taken herself very seriously, the growling. Maybe it was a good idea to remind me.

"We're okay with Mom."

"How'd you manage that?"

"I told her I had Mono."

"Mononucleosis?"

"Yeah, what ever."   I was trapped with a crazy person.

"I told her I felt funny when I woke up yesterday and I got worse during the day until you took me to the hospital. They took a culture and said I had Mono. The Doctor said I couldn't get on the plane because I would give it to everybody else on the plane. They said I had to stay here until I was better. Then I could fly home."

"And did this imaginary doctor tell you how long it would be before you felt better?"

"A week to ten days. But we can say I felt better right away and we can fly home on Wednesday. Maybe Mom will keep me out of school for Thursday and Friday, but we're golden. I got sick too fast for us to call and tell her we weren't coming. AND, and I think this is the really great part. I told her the doctor didn't want me to stay at the hospital where I could make other people sick. So he said I should be in a hotel room, where they send in the meal. I said we moved to Eden Bay because it was only two hundred dollars a night for the two of us. I said we agreed to share a room as you were probably exposed and shouldn't take a chance on exposing others.

"Isn't that great?"

"Very clever. Did you actually tell Mom what the doctor said about how long you would be sick?"

"No, not exactly. I told her though that I was feeling better and thought I could come home sooner then the doctor thought."

"And Mom didn't ask how long that might be?"

"No." She was frowning at me. I was supposed to be impressed by how clever she was. Not only was Mom not angry with us anymore, she was probably feeling guilty for how angry she had been.

"Apparently you don't know that Mono takes a month to run its course."

"No. What do you mean, 'run its course?'"

"Typically Mono knocks you on your back, in bed, for a month of puking and shitting. You have chills and fevers and you're too tired to sit up and eat. You have to push the fluids or you could dehydrate and die. Most people loose between twenty and thirty pounds."

There was a long silence.

"Mr. Thomas had a substitute in fifth grade, but ... I don't remember it being for a month."

"A Month."

"It doesn't have to be a month, does it?"

"I don't know. I just know its usually a month. When I was in Middle School like five or six people at my school got it. It was called the kissing disease because you could get it by kissing some one."

"That's what Mom said. She wanted to know who I'd been kissing and I said nobody, but she didn't believe me."

"Yeah, it was a big sandal when one of our teachers got it but his wife didn't. But he was the kind of guy who liked to finish off everybody's Pepsi."

"Yuck!"

"Yeah."

She stared at me for awhile. I wasn't sure if I was pleased or not. She had to be considering the fact that we were stuck together in a tropical paradise for the next month. Maybe we could move to a place with less ...

"Did you tell Mom the name of the place we were staying?"

"Yeah, I gave her the phone number too."

Nope, we weren't moving. Elly might even increase the limit on my credit card.

"Are you sure about this?"

"You can look it up. I might be wrong on some details but there's no way Mom isn't going to kill us if you go home next week, without a hospital release, a face mask and ten or more pounds lighter."

"Shit."

Yup, but I'd said enough.

We sat there for a while. Guilt suppressing us like a big heavy wet down quilt.

"I'm hungry. You want to go get something to eat? There's a bar by the beach that serves hamburgers until 2 am."

And then it was gone. Every thing we'd said for the last hour or more.

I was stunned by the shallowness. I didn't answer and she got impatient.

"Well?"

"We would have to get naked, wouldn't we?"

"Yeah." And then she remembered the base conversation.

"I could get you something and comeback with it."

Yeah, I was hungry too. And tired. Fortunately she didn't need my wallet to get a hamburger, everything was included.

Oh, yeah, I would have fit right in at the beach side bar.       Actual picture

I was asleep when Rene returned, some time later. I was still asleep when she got hungry again and ate my burger too. And I slept through her going in and out I don't know how many times.

I was asleep.

Eventfully I woke up when Rene came in through the patio doors. My head was heavy so I knew it hadn't been any half hour nap. But I was annoyed when I sat up enough to see the remains of two former hamburgers and sides. (And I knew it wasn't likely I was going to get any sleep that night. Even though Rene kindly put on her skirt and top once she was in the room.)

"Uhm, you shouldn't have let me sleep so long."

"I tried to wake you up when I came back with the food."

I believed her. I stumbled into the bathroom and while I was there I remembered where we'd left the conversation.

When I returned Rene was flipping through the TV channels and I sat back down on the bed. The farthest I could get from her in the room. "You need to tell me."

"What?"

"Is Julio still here?"

"No. I haven't seen him. Why do care?"

"Because I'd pay him to keep you company."

She shook her head in the way that meant, you don't understand.

"What's wrong? I know he was a jerk but-"

"I don't want Julio. I don't want to be with him."

"Oh. I thought you liked him."

"I did. He was great." Yeah and so ...? "But he's boring, and he smells."

"Rene dear, I know I'm being really slow about this but ... just why did you book us into a Nudists resort for FIVE days if you didn't want to spend time with your lover? There are cheaper places."

"Yeah, but, I wanted to learn more."

"More?" I was in some stupid game, where I knew what the answer was but I still had to take the baby steps along the way. At least there wasn't a Pat Sajak or Vanna White.

"About sex. Julio was great for my first time. He's good looking, great body, he loves to fuck but ... he only loves to fuck strait."

I could hear the crowds yelling at me. If I was home on my couch I'd know what the phrase was but all I could think of was, strait as opposed to homosexual?

"Missionary style."

TMI, TMI, TMI!!!!!

"Oh, and beejays for variety."

TMI, TMI!!!!

My head was screaming it, why couldn't she hear it?

"This is my one chance to learn with out being embarrassed and without it effecting my whole relationship."

I was flush and I was sweating, these are symptoms of something but I just couldn't remember what.

"Well, are you going to say anything?"

"So you booked us into a nudists colony?"

"Uh huh"

"Are you aware that nudist look badly upon public displays of affection. And that this one caters to families with kids?"

"Only until 10 PM."

That was a non-sequiter, I was sure of it.

"After ten the kids aren't allowed out of the buildings. They can't use the pool, the patio, the beach, they have to stay inside. They open the disco at eleven and it goes to three or when people leave. I told you the Burger stand stays open until two and ... The pool is where most of the sex happens. They call if the 'Lifestyle Lounge.'"

The "lifestyle?"

"Dear, are you aware of what the term, The Lifestyle refers to?"

"Yeah, swinging."

I couldn't help it. "And your plan was to learn about sex by being the sex toy of bored middle aged couples?"

"No silly!"

Oh, of course not. How could I have been so stupid?

"Then I guess you're going to have to explain the rest to me because I'm still not getting it." Even Pat Sajak was giving me the look now.

"I saw you."

"You saw me what? Get hard when I looked at you?" I wished I hadn't said that, it didn't help.

"I saw you with Christa."

"You saw me what, with Christa? Kiss her?"

"Yeah. And the way you held her."

I'd held her? I thought I tried to control that, in front of the kids.

"The way you looked at her. It wasn't the way Julio looked at me."

I didn't think I wanted to know the rest of that.

"And I saw you go down on her."

Oh Shit!

And what was it, dear, about the way I went down on my prostitute that made you want to spend five nights at a nudists colony?

"Julio wouldn't go down on me."

TMI, TMI (Wasn't anybody listening?)

"He said it was disgusting, and unnatural and that no real man would ever go down on a woman."

A few weeks later I would have agreed with her and her righteous indignation. But right now there was a shoe in the air and it was getting bigger by the second. And to mix a metaphor, the sensors were in danger of wearing out the bleep button.

"I've got a copy of the Karma Sutra."

Oh God, please let that be another non-sequitter.

"I didn't bring it with me. Obviously. But I've got it memorized and the most I could get Julio to do was five positions, and that's only because a bunch of those positions are almost identical."

And she left it there.

I was hanging on by a thread. The crowd was screaming the phrase at me but I couldn't understand them. The sensor in the booth was sweating bullets and that shoe was really really big and so very ugly.

"And?"

"Well, like I said, this is my chance"

The ground started to give out under the cliff edge.

"RENE, I'm dying here, just tell me the whole thing."

"I want you to teach me the rest of the Karma Sutra."

My heart exploded, the cliff edge gave out, the thread broke, the crowd rushed the stage and lunged for my throat, the sensor jammed the poor bleep button right through the desk and the shoe turned out to be full of used radiator sludge.

Rene went on about how she could trust me, the efficacy of condoms, how it would help prepare her for the rest of her life ...

I didn't register any of it.

Rene was on the bed beside me. She was rubbing my back and making cooing noises. I had my face smashed between the mattress and the head board with a pillow stuffed into each ear.

God or somebody was having the biggest laugh ever. Ever squirm and whimper on my part was sending them rolling on the floor. I hated everything.

The truth was a white light that came burning through the darkness. I was going to fuck my daughter. I knew it as certain as I knew anything. Humans had at least a hundred thousand years of taboos against incest and unlike Rene, I believed in their basic rightness. But it didn't matter. The gods, and in this I included my daughter, had conspired against me.

If we came home early, Elly would be suspicious, it wouldn't take much to find out about Viking and Eden and the doctor and the conclusions were obvious. I would be having a lot more sex, but I would be bent over a bar in the exercise grounds and my daddy would sell my ass for a cigarette a pop. If I was lucky I'd die of AIDs.

If we moved, Elly would have to know.

If we staid here but I refused to touch Rene ...

Yeah, at home I could go for a month without sex. I'd gone years at a time. But in the company of a nubile who wanted my body ... And Surrounded by hundreds of naked persons. I wasn't an animal, I could resist, I already had resisted for what, not quite twenty four hours.

I wanted my mother. She would make this all go away. But My mother was long dead and she never would have understood the first part of the problem.

So I pulled away the pillows and grabbed her.

I hugged her so tight, and I kissed her so hard and I ran my fingers through her hair and ...

I'm not going to tell you what happened after that. I'm sure I made the most hopeless teenage virgin boy look like a sophisticate.

Many hours later we were relaxed and comfortably laying on the bed together. Relaxed and comfortable as you can only be with some one you've had sex with. I left the door open when I peed and the tiny shower stall was more then enough for the two of us. We were hungry again and we strolled into the night, as naked as when we were born. I had no fear of offending. You'd need a crane to move it past straight down.

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